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[thirtythird]

@ wlawford
room 023; bunk 025 (with loki odinson)
text ✰ voice ✰ holovid

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[dothelokimotion]

Then I thank you for that too.

Truth is not something I hear often.

[thirtythird]

Then I shall do my utmost to lavish it upon you.

[dothelokimotion]

. . . Why me?

[thirtythird]

Quite handsome.

[But, in a much truer way:]

And I suppose you quite remind me of someone quite dear to my heart.

[dothelokimotion]

May I ask who?

[thirtythird]

A man called Richard Sharpe.

It isn't that you're properly like him. You've worlds more finesse than he'll ever hope to, for a start.

[dothelokimotion]

[ that . . . that helps. he had been afraid. briefly. ]

No, I am myself in all things. But it is strange to hear I am similar to others.

[thirtythird]

It was just the first moment, largely. When I met Dick for the first time, he had this look in his eyes and at the corner of his jaw. I'd never seen anything quite like it. It ought to have been frightening, but it made me ask his name.

I've not regretted a moment of knowing him. And I've not regretted a moment of knowing you.

[dothelokimotion]

That may change.

[thirtythird]

Ah, another way you're not at all like Dick. I'm not sure I've met a man more confident in himself.

But I'm sure you'll tire of me long before I you.

[dothelokimotion]

I would not. I could not.

[thirtythird]

How can you be so certain, darling?

[dothelokimotion]

[ because it's all he's ever wanted it. something like this, a feeling, a heartbeat, one that he doesn't have to compete with thor or hide away in shame. one that feels wholly pure in a strange way.

one he hasn't ruined. ]

I've never tired of people. Not ones who let me close.

[thirtythird]

Where are you, Loki?

[dothelokimotion]

I'm at the gardens. Why?

[thirtythird]

I'd like very much to see you.

[A hug will convey this sentiment better than words.]

[dothelokimotion]

I'll be waiting then.

[thirtythird]

You don't mind?

[dothelokimotion]

No, of course not.

[thirtythird]

[Good, because he's absolutely already on his way, muted but not without his usual aura of good cheer, and very much intent on beelining into a warm, quiet hug.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki was leaning against the glass. he finds himself here often, just looking out the window. trying to find anything that looked familiar.

nothing came, but he looked anyway. when lawford arrives, he turns, warmth in his gaze. ]

[thirtythird]

Ah, mo chuisle.

[There's quiet affection licking in the air around him even before he pulls his arm around the god's shoulders, nudging his face in quietly against the join of the neck.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ oh. that's very surprising. very new. thor has hugged him before but thor is the only one who would bother. plus, loki himself shies away from it, too afraid of what he might do. what might happen. feels the push of blue poison under his skin.

his palms tentatively rest over lawford's back. ]

[thirtythird]

[A moment of quiet is needed to simply let the contact sink properly into place. It isn't so much waiting for relaxation as something closer to acceptance; to belief, at least, in this first piece of what needs saying.]

I'm certain of you.

[Maybe it won't be believed just yet, but saying it over and over might be a start.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ his world trembles like a leaf. ships in storms, rocked in glass bottles. certainty. he's never known it. not really. you're incapable of sincerity. you were born to die, cast out.

no, loki.

it's only lately that thor said, I chose you, above all else that has soothed the worst tremors. even then, his heart trembles. it's such a weak thing. it broke so often that loki has lost count of the times he has stitched it together with his own magpie-hope sealing the threads.

sentiment.

his arms twine around lawford, stronger now. though they tremble with the weight of him. of them.

loki blinks the sentiment from his eyes. they stain his cheeks. ]